Well, I did it. I did one of the two things I swore could not possibly be for me. I went to my first ever Yoga class. Aside from the two times that I did try to follow along with a Rodney Yee video in the small living room of my cousin's former house several years ago, I have never practiced Yoga as it was meant to be done. So, after much reading about it and some searching in my area for classes/instructors, I found one that intrigued me. I emailed the instructor, Audrey, and expressed my interest. She seemed very thrilled and after a few emails and one phone call, I set up an appointment to meet with her before I went in to her class. (She's VERY thorough and a "Yoga Extremist" in my opinion.) We decided to talk through the basics last night at 7pm. I got really excited about my new adventure and that excitement bubbled right over into straight-up panic. What was I thinking? I'm not "bendy", I am certainly lacking in any sort of strength, and I had a hard enough time remembering to breathe when I was tense about ANYTHING! I mean, Nate had to pause the movie "Hurt Locker" about a dozen times so I could watch it without falling out in the floor! And my MIND! How was I ever going to be able to focus all of the thoughts and energies into living in the present moment, one minute at a time? This venture had to be nothing short of space/time continuum bending, earth shattering, mind altering MAGIC for me to be able to practice successfully.
So, I pull on my best little yoga outfit (a.k.a. my ONLY yoga outfit), slung my mat over my shoulder and drove to the little workout center for my date with destiny. I sat and waited and tried to look as "yoga" as possible, then, Audrey came in. She wasn't a soft-spoken, perma-smile, tiny little yogi as I had imagined. She didn't smell like patchouli and float from point a to point b. Nope. She was a little taller, broad shouldered, and extremely confident. She moved with purpose and immediately, she was awesome in my mind. She started talking and telling me all about what I needed to do to be successful in my yoga practice. She was throwing in words that I couldn't say, or spell, or even begin to understand. And, after reassuring me that I didn't need to know all of this immediately, she gave me handouts. With stick figures that she had drawn. And specific instructions on my homework assignment that I had to practice at least 5 days a week. Holy cow, I was overwhelmed.
Apparently, she could tell because she stopped in mid-sentence and said, "Look. Here is all I want you to take away from this tonight. Every breath in or out is linked to a movement and concentrate on finding your Drishti." I knew that one of my handouts had some terminology on it, so I quickly scanned it to find out what the heck this woman was talking about. Turns out, a Drishti is a focal point. It is the place in your pose that you fix your gaze as you are scanning your body (or listening to your body). "But, don't just stare at something", she says. "Look at whatever point you choose but don't really 'look' at it." All I could think was, "Crap. With these kinds of mind games, I'm up a creek here."
So, we spread out our mats and started class. And it wasn't easy. But it was such an awesome experience for me. I didn't know that my body could move in some of the ways that it did in that class. For once, I wasn't stressing that I wasn't keeping up with everyone else. I wasn't thinking about how awful my work week had been, or what I was going to do about this issue or that issue. I was searching for my Drishti. But, now, I couldn't even tell you what that focal point spot looked like. All I know is that for the moment in time, I found it, and with it, I found some peace inside of my mind.
Namaste.
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